Cranky

it is a sweltering day, the air conditioning is bust and you are cranky as hell.

you stand at the sink, elbow deep in washing up. i decide to be a pest and come up behind you and squeeze your bum. you snarl under your breath and try to ignore me but i am full of mischeif today and i try to lift your skirt. you tell me to “fucking grow up!” i press myself against you so you can feel how stiff i am. “and you can take that fucking thing away!” you snap and i laugh at your anger which only makes it worse.

“oh come on hon,” i emplore, “just a quickie?” you spin round and glare at me, eyes ablaze, holding a half washed wooden spoon threateningly. i reach out to grab one of your breasts and you rap my knuckles with the spoon and tell me i’m “asking for a fucking slap mister!” i dare you to, not entirely sure you won’t and pull again at your skirt, pushing myself against you, making sure you can feel what you are doing to me. you make all kinds of pathetic excuses – you’re too busy – its the middle of the day – you haven’t had a shower – the kids will be home soon – blah blah blah. i can feel you folding though, see you fighting a smile. you tell me that you hate me and we fuck right there against the sink, rattling the pots and pans, not undressing, you not even taking off the marigold gloves.

after, you ask me sweetly to help with the chores, “not a fucking chance” i laugh, doing up my zip. the frying pan brings out a lump on my head as big as an egg.

13 responses

  1. veronicahaunanifitzhugh

    list of things to do…dishes, kyle, mopping, kyle…..

    12.02.19 at 21.09

    • nah, whack me on the head with a pan – its my thing
      and… just in case no-one’s noticed this is just a story, actually i’m quite good around the house

      12.02.19 at 21.11

      • veronicahaunanifitzhugh

        consider yourself, pan whacked, hun.

        12.02.19 at 21.14

        • hit me again veronica

          12.02.19 at 21.19

          • veronicahaunanifitzhugh

            only if you write please and mean it.

            12.02.19 at 21.21

            • please, pretty please, i so mean it – and if i don’t, hit me again. please

              12.02.19 at 21.26

              • veronicahaunanifitzhugh

                consider yourself hit twice for being saucy.

                12.02.19 at 21.58

                • aww only twice

                  12.02.19 at 22.02

                  • veronicahaunanifitzhugh

                    showwomanship is key when dealing in the art of seduction. i give you two for please and sauciness in anticipation of how far you will go for three.

                    12.02.19 at 22.05

                    • probably too far

                      12.02.19 at 22.15

                    • veronicahaunanifitzhugh

                      i don’t think it’s possible to over indulge an over indulger. 🙂

                      12.02.19 at 22.17

  2. hilarious…you got what you deserved..ha…ha…ha!

    12.02.19 at 09.33

    • ha ha ha – i sure did – thanks Katie

      12.02.19 at 15.24

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