Still better than porn

People tend not to believe me when I say that I’ve watched very little porn. But I don’t see the point: I have an imagination.

I’ve never thought that I had a very good imagination and my masturbatory fantasies are certainly no masterpieces. There’s very little in the way of back story and although I’m proud of my character development and story arc (particularly during the denouement), I tend to rely on tried and tested themes and avoid any plot twists.

As for the casting, It’s atrocious. All the female roles are unbelievably beautiful and clearly way out of my league. Nobody, in their right mind, would believe that women like that would want to sleep with me, let alone be eager to. And yet, for some unfathomable reason, I believe every scene without question.

My own role in this nonsense is perhaps the most ridiculous of all: I cast myself as an heroic super-lover, able to maintain and erection for days and satisfy any number of women. And as if things couldn’t get any more pathetic, this character even has a bigger cock than I do and is able to produce enough semen to drown a small choir.

The irony that I am, in reality, a scrawny, worn-out fifty-something who can barely keep it up for the duration of a quick restroom wank seems to pass me by completely.
That is until I finish…

And it’s still better than porn.

3 responses

  1. Fifty something? 😉 How old is this post? Love you buddy and you’re perfect just the way you are. I outta know…cause I love you. xoxo

    21.07.25 at 18.30

    • 58 so I just squeeze in there 😉

      21.07.25 at 18.40

      • Why did I think you were closer to me? Dang! Well, it’s all good. We are as old as we feel anyway. Yikes, probably not the best saying I could think of at the moment. I feel 100!!!

        21.07.25 at 18.59

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